Monday 4 August 2014

Defence Against the Dark Arts Part VI: Two amusing anecdotes

I have many painful memories of incidents in shops and on buses. I have one or two positive memories to offset the bad ones, memories that give good feelings whenever I return to them.

The honest electronic equipment salesman
Some years ago, I was very dejected after realising that I had been cheated by a laptop repair company. They lied to me when they told me that they had returned my laptop to the manufacturer: the latter said they had never seen it. I was without my laptop for weeks, and I paid a lot of money for repairs that did not last very long. 

I found another repair shop nearby; they told me that they got a lot of business from people like me, people who had been given bad service by the other place. 

I was waiting in this shop when some people came in and asked if they sold video cameras. 

One of the men behind the counter said, “We only have one model, and I wouldn’t buy it if I were you: it’s rubbish!” 

When I told him that I admired his honesty he said, “It’s always best to be honest. The only person I ever lie to is my wife:  I would never get any peace if I didn’t.” 

I thought that this was very amusing. It lifted my mood and things did not seem quite so black.  

I was much more selective when choosing the second repair company than I was with the first one, which by coincidence went bankrupt not long afterwards.

The witty bus conductor
I may have still been at school at the time of another amusing incident: it certainly was a very long time ago. 

I was on a bus when a very smartly-dressed man jumped on. There was something about him that suggested to me that he was not accustomed to travelling on buses: perhaps his chauffeur was ill or his Rolls-Royce was being repaired! 

He asked the conductor, “Does this bus go to Marble Arch?” 

The conductor, a pleasant, relaxed Jamaican man, said, “Yes, Sir, it does”. 

The man brightened up: he obviously appreciated being called ‘Sir’. 

He then asked, “How much do I owe you?” 

The conductor said in reply, “Sit down and make yourself comfortable Sir, and we’ll discuss the money question later.”

The man obviously thought that this was very funny: he kept smiling to himself for the remainder of his journey.  I guessed that he could not wait to tell the chaps at his club about his unexpectedly entertaining bus journey. 

Little things such as these incidents can have big effects. They help to counter negativity and lift one’s spirits.