Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Unseen influences:should we forget it to get it?

I remember how devastated I felt when I first read somewhere that wanting something very much is likely to activate forces that prevent our getting it. People who can take it or leave it are more likely to get it. This rule seems very unfair, but it explains a lot. I just wish that I had learned it much earlier in life.

I noticed a similar rule operating in my life: one way to get something I want is to forget about it!

The shoes
I went on a trip that involved a lot of walking; I was not satisfied with the shoes I had so decided to get some new ones for my next trip. I went everywhere in the main shopping street and to a few other places; I spent many hours looking for something suitable, but came away with nothing. There was always a catch: shoes that I really liked were much too expensive; the cheaper ones did not have everything I was looking for in the same model. Where I liked the colour, they would not have my size; where I liked the style, they would not have the colour I liked.

I decided to forget it and wear the old shoes again. A few hours after letting go of the idea of new shoes, I was on my way home when my bus went past a clothes shop with a rack of shoes outside. I went to investigate, and found some perfect shoes on sale! I used to go past that shop most days, and this was the first, last and only time they had a rack outside. I felt that the universe had arranged everything just for my benefit.

I told this story to someone who was present on both trips, and she said that exactly the same thing had happened to her.  She just could not find anything suitable anywhere, so gave up and resigned herself to wearing her old shoes again. Not long after this, she happened to pass a charity shop, saw some shoes in the window, went inside to have a closer look and found that they were exactly what she was looking for. They were very cheap too!

The fantasy books
I wanted to read a series of fantasy novels again, but I no longer had the books. I vaguely remembered the stories, and felt a strong inclination to renew my acquaintance with them in the light of all the things I had learned and experienced since I first read them.  I scoured large numbers of local new and second-hand bookshops without success – this was before eBay and the Internet became options for me as I was very late to that game – and I gave up when I realised that the books were out of print.

Some weeks later, I felt an inclination to have a day out in a particular small town. I was wandering around the central area; I turned off into a side street, and came to a charity shop. Eight or so books by the author I was interested in were in the window, including all the ones I particularly wanted. I bought them all – for very little money. I just could not believe my luck. Even better, the magic had not gone and I enjoyed reading the books again after a very long interval.

Getting it while looking for something else
I noticed a pattern after some similar experiences. I would go out looking for something; I would not find it even after visiting many shops. I would put it out of my mind, and soon go on a hunt for something else.  I would not find the second item during the second expedition, but I would come across a perfect model of the first item I wanted. And I would find the second item while searching for a third or fourth!

It was as if I had notified the universe of what I wanted, done my share of the work by visiting many shops then handed the job over to a higher authority. By giving up, I was informing the universe that the ball was now in its court .

Somehow my concentration during the hunt for a particular item made it easy to guide me to a previously wanted one. It has to be spontaneous: it did not work when I deliberately tried to make it happen.

It seems that the way to get more experiences such as these, the way to get small things that we want, is to feel gratitude and appreciation and in particular to tell other people the story of our good luck and how happy we are to have got something that we wanted.