Cult leaders and members may push the message that they and
their organisation are the sole source of something - for example information,
hope for the future, democracy for an oppressed nation or even salvation. You
will never get what you want without their help; only they can inform you about
and explain something; only they have the answers; they are the elite and nothing
and no one else is any good to you.
It is best to beware of anyone who tries to attract
your interest and recruit you by playing the sole supplier game. You can expect
to hear a lot of this sort of thing:
“We are your only hope.” “We are the only ones who can tell you what
is really going on.” “Without us, the evil regime will never be overthrown.”
“When civilisation collapses, you will die unless you join us now and learn
survival skills.”
It is important to understand that this is
what they all say. It is a case of same game, different players.
If you buy their messages, they may try to
get you to support or even commit everything that you have to their cause or
movement.
Cults and their representatives want your
money; they want to fool, manipulate and intimidate you. If you seem suitable
for membership, they will want to draw you in and control you, your life and
your thoughts. They will want you to reply on them for everything and depend on
them alone.
In order to avoid being taken advantage of,
it is essential to research everything and to expose the implied messages,
subject them to reality testing and determine what the ulterior motives and
hidden agenda are.
A good example from the commercial world
It is not just cults that play the sole
supplier game.
I read about a man who very stupidly paid a
£5,000 joining fee to learn about and be put forward for high-level executive
positions that a company said they were the sole contact and only source of
information for. They told him that without their help, he would not get the
high-powered job he was looking for.
It was all lies; they took advantage of his
ignorance and gullibility; they just wanted his money. A little research would have prevented his
being exploited, and he could have tried LinkedIn, company websites and other
sources of executive jobs.
Most people know that reputable agencies
charge the employer only, never the job hunter. While it may be true that many
top jobs are not advertised, suitable people will know about them from informal
networks and moving in the right circles.
Of course he did not get the job of his
dreams from these crooks. Ironically, falling for this con shows that he is not
very suitable for a senior position!
Religion and politics
Being swindled out of large sums of money and
getting nothing in return is bad enough; being tricked or intimidated into handing
over your autonomy or even your soul is worse.
There are people who say that you will go to
hell if you don’t believe, say and do what their religious organisation says
you should. Theirs is the only path, the one true God, the only hope for the
salvation of mankind...
Then we have the cult leader who tells
political refugees that they will never be able to return home unless they
dedicate themselves to serving him and his organisation. He promises to overthrow the oppressive government;
he says he is their only hope.
It is all about manipulation and emotional
blackmail.
Playing the As If game
The As If game is often part of the sole
source syndrome.
“We are your only hope” is very clear, but
there are often more subtle suggestions behind this and similar messages.
You may get this if you are unwise enough to
show any interest in what these people have to say:
“We want to come and tell you about x.” “We
want to explain x to you.”
The implications are that you won’t get to
hear about x unless they tell you, and that you won’t understand x unless they
explain it to you. This is ridiculous, but people fall for it.
The people who promote themselves as sole
suppliers of information often behave as if there were no alternative options
such as research and the Internet.
I have never been involved with multi-level
marketing in any way, but I have read a lot about it and seen some very familiar
elements, including the as if game.
Someone will inform their contacts that they
want to tell them about an exciting and unique opportunity to make money; they
want to explain it in person.
Their agenda is to put pressure on you to buy
products directly from them and/or sign up as a distributor. They hope that you
will be dazzled by the hype and spin. They just want your money.
Using aloe vera juice as an example, why
would I need anyone to tell me that it exists and about the benefits of using
it? If I wanted some, I could get it much cheaper from many other sources. I
could even get some plants and make my own.
I have experienced something similar recently,
when someone pressed hard for one-to-one meetings to tell me about my options
and explain them all to me, as if I wouldn’t know or understand anything without
their help.
I am quite capable of doing my own research,
and there are many sources of the relevant information available. I know exactly
what my options are and understand their implications only too well, thank you
very much!
Their real motive is to get personal
information that can be used to manipulate me. They also hope that I will be
easier to intimidate if they see me alone. Many others are also being pushed to
attend these meetings; we have let the bad guys know that we don’t need their input and
we can see through all their little games.
These messages are a dead giveaway
Anyone who tells you that they are your only
source of something without providing any evidence is best avoided.
If someone wants to get you alone to tell you
about something but won’t say exactly what it is, they too are probably up to
no good.
I quoted some wise words from Vernon Howard earlier. Some are very relevant and worth repeating here:
“When meeting anyone you should ask yourself:
‘what does he want that I must not give?’”
That last one could be enhanced to include
seeing why other people have been victims: painful personal experience is not
the only way to learn. Once again, it is all about research.
