I had a bad day recently, the exact opposite of what I expected.
I had planned a circular walkabout that would combine fresh air, exercise, errands, a treat and a visit to a park.
Unfortunately, it was more of an endurance test than an enjoyable experience. It was just one thing after another, so I gave in and went home.
Unfortunately, that was not the end of the misfortunes.
It all started when I went to get some money from the cash machine. When I pressed the button, all I got was my balance on the screen. I felt paranoid, as though I had been cut off from my money. After a few more tries, I realised that the menu text on the screen was misaligned with the buttons. I got my cash out and went on to the library, where I found that my library card wouldn’t go through any of the machines so had to ask the librarian to do everything manually.
I got some takeaway breakfast items. My plan was to eat them in a local public garden. I walked down a steep street and along the park railings. The gate I wanted to use was chained up: there was a lot of construction work going on. I had to walk all the way back to another gate, past all the vans and workmen.
I was sitting on a bench drinking my coffee and reading my library book when I was interrupted by a group of young people who asked me if I would complete a survey. I don't like doing this sort of thing, and I felt jarred by having my concentration broken. The food I bought was not as good as I hoped it would be either. I walked back up the steep street to the main road, which was exhausting. I had intended to walk through a market area and back home, but I had lost all energy and inclination so got a bus back.
I was getting my entry fob out when a strange man appeared and wanted to come in too. I told him that he should ring the bell of whoever he had come to visit. He didn’t seem to understand and still thought I would let him in, but luckily a friend came along and we both got inside by ourselves. The man was probably ok but it is amazing how these things happen at the wrong time, just when I don't feel up to dealing with them.
Sometimes every little thing seems like the last straw. There was an official letter waiting that really annoyed me: I had to confirm that my details had not changed, and this had to be done by post as there was no online option. Having to complete a form and go out to post it seemed like too much trouble.
Not only that, but for the first time ever the money I had taken out included a £50 note. I was not sure what to do with it: I often shop in street markets and bargain stores and spend only a little at a time.
Later that day, I found that I had mis-read the TV schedule and missed some good programmes.
This was not the end of my problems. My laptop was very slow; I thought I might have given a wrong response to a question that popped up earlier, so I decided to do a Restore. My usual browser would not function afterwards, and it took a while before I realised that I could use another one and look for a fix.
I did manage to get my laptop back to normal, but it was a very stressful time.
My normal practice on days such as this is to work backwards and look for an energy vampire. Although I had indeed met a new client for the first time two days earlier, I am sure that she was not the cause of my problems. I did not get any bad feelings from her.
My theory is that I was in a vulnerable state because I had been pushing myself very hard and had attracted unwanted attention by investigating some convenient deaths. I had been working online for long stretches for days on end, concentrating very hard on collecting and absorbing information. Some of it was just routine facts and figures I needed for my work, but much of it was in connection with an article for this blog.
Perhaps when a light bulb goes on in the mind of someone who can sense unseen influences, it is the equivalent of alerting a spider by touching its web.
Perhaps the bad feelings and unwelcome experiences were a punishment for being a dot connector and a whistle-blower I am not going to stop doing it though!
I had planned a circular walkabout that would combine fresh air, exercise, errands, a treat and a visit to a park.
Unfortunately, it was more of an endurance test than an enjoyable experience. It was just one thing after another, so I gave in and went home.
Unfortunately, that was not the end of the misfortunes.
It all started when I went to get some money from the cash machine. When I pressed the button, all I got was my balance on the screen. I felt paranoid, as though I had been cut off from my money. After a few more tries, I realised that the menu text on the screen was misaligned with the buttons. I got my cash out and went on to the library, where I found that my library card wouldn’t go through any of the machines so had to ask the librarian to do everything manually.
I got some takeaway breakfast items. My plan was to eat them in a local public garden. I walked down a steep street and along the park railings. The gate I wanted to use was chained up: there was a lot of construction work going on. I had to walk all the way back to another gate, past all the vans and workmen.
I was sitting on a bench drinking my coffee and reading my library book when I was interrupted by a group of young people who asked me if I would complete a survey. I don't like doing this sort of thing, and I felt jarred by having my concentration broken. The food I bought was not as good as I hoped it would be either. I walked back up the steep street to the main road, which was exhausting. I had intended to walk through a market area and back home, but I had lost all energy and inclination so got a bus back.
I was getting my entry fob out when a strange man appeared and wanted to come in too. I told him that he should ring the bell of whoever he had come to visit. He didn’t seem to understand and still thought I would let him in, but luckily a friend came along and we both got inside by ourselves. The man was probably ok but it is amazing how these things happen at the wrong time, just when I don't feel up to dealing with them.
Sometimes every little thing seems like the last straw. There was an official letter waiting that really annoyed me: I had to confirm that my details had not changed, and this had to be done by post as there was no online option. Having to complete a form and go out to post it seemed like too much trouble.
Not only that, but for the first time ever the money I had taken out included a £50 note. I was not sure what to do with it: I often shop in street markets and bargain stores and spend only a little at a time.
Later that day, I found that I had mis-read the TV schedule and missed some good programmes.
This was not the end of my problems. My laptop was very slow; I thought I might have given a wrong response to a question that popped up earlier, so I decided to do a Restore. My usual browser would not function afterwards, and it took a while before I realised that I could use another one and look for a fix.
I did manage to get my laptop back to normal, but it was a very stressful time.
My normal practice on days such as this is to work backwards and look for an energy vampire. Although I had indeed met a new client for the first time two days earlier, I am sure that she was not the cause of my problems. I did not get any bad feelings from her.
My theory is that I was in a vulnerable state because I had been pushing myself very hard and had attracted unwanted attention by investigating some convenient deaths. I had been working online for long stretches for days on end, concentrating very hard on collecting and absorbing information. Some of it was just routine facts and figures I needed for my work, but much of it was in connection with an article for this blog.
Perhaps when a light bulb goes on in the mind of someone who can sense unseen influences, it is the equivalent of alerting a spider by touching its web.
Perhaps the bad feelings and unwelcome experiences were a punishment for being a dot connector and a whistle-blower I am not going to stop doing it though!
An encouraging proverb:
