I have on several occasions been on the receiving end of such actions myself. The introductory article gives examples of letters that ‘by chance’ arrived at the worst possible time:
“Family letters were infrequent, so the timing of these two was very significant. It is amazing how these unconscious saboteurs can ensure that their victims are hit where and when it hurts most.”
Another such letter arrived out of the blue recently, just before I received some very depressing news. This time however I was not badly affected, just slightly annoyed. If this was yet another attempted attack, it fell very flat!
The unwelcome and unnecessary letter
A letter arrived in the post from a family member I have minimal contact with, offering to send someone round with anything I might need. This was completely unnecessary; I replied immediately that I had not got the coronavirus, had plenty of supplies, could easily get more and had people I could call on for assistance if required.
An hour or two later, I got an email from a friend telling me that her father had died. I knew that he had been ill, but thought that he was recovering. He was an exceptionally nice and kind man; this was not a devastating, heart-breaking bereavement, but I felt very sad indeed to think that I would never see him again.
What a coincidence that the only communication apart from Christmas cards that I have received from this person for many years should arrive just before I had some very bad news, and, conversely, that the only very upsetting news of this kind I have received for many years should have been preceded by this unexpected and unwelcome letter.
Chance or an unconscious sabotage attempt?
If this had been an isolated incident I would let it go, but it needs to be put into context: many of the elements have been covered in previous articles.
It may appear to be a genuine offer of help from a concerned person and this may actually have been the conscious motive for sending the letter, but I have learned the hard way not to take things at face value. Something may put ‘good ideas’ into people’s minds.
My radar told me that the letter was a disguised attack and an attempt at infiltration. It seemed scribbled hastily by someone who was very unsettled at the time. The timing is ‘interesting’ too: she could have got the idea of sending it when the major lockdown was first announced or after it had been in place for a few more weeks, but the inclination - or compulsion - came just at the point where the letter would - in theory - do the most damage.
There is also a similar incident from the past to consider:
This same family member once phoned to say that she was sending someone over with something for me. Even though I said several times that I didn’t want anyone to come and she could just post it, she ignored my wishes and gave my address without my permission to a very unpleasant man who duly appeared with something I had no use for.
Some predators are always looking for pretexts to approach their intended prey. They give the impression of being desperate to feed.
The best approach
Studying unseen influences can pay dividends. It is good practice not to let unfinished business pile up but to learn as much as possible from painful incidents and try to find ways of preventing or at least not reacting to them in future. If they are arranged to supply food and fuel in the form of fear and pain, don’t give ‘them’ anything and the incidents will stop.
I said in an article about three possible ways of dealing with unfinished business that it is possible to spiral upwards:
“Each time something unpleasant happens, it is essential to prepare for another occurrence and aim to do a little better next time.”
It is interesting that this time around she asked whether I wanted someone to come! This is a great improvement on the previous attack. Perhaps this was because last time I let her know that I was furious about being bulldozed over. I told her that her behaviour was overbearing and unacceptable and said how much I hated uninvited visitors.
As for the attack that missed its target, perhaps I was intended to feel frightened by some subliminal messages, messages such as, “We are still here, we are still watching you, we are still trying to get back into your life, we still want to destroy you by sending a missile at the worst possible time.”!
Instead of feeling paranoid I felt slightly pitying, just as I did on the occasion of a different kind of attempted sabotage:
“...by then I had long been aware of the possibility of unconscious sabotage so I just mentally said to whatever might be behind these incidents, ‘Is that all you’ve got? Is that the best you can do? I am so sorry to disappoint you.’”
It will be interesting to see whether or not I get another of these ‘letter bombs’! As the recent one was a wasted effort, I suspect that there will be no more.
